So my high school career is over! I am officially a graduate of Faith Christian School-I have joined the ranks of 125 allumi! As I embark on a new journey and time in life, I must say I will miss deeply the chapter I have just closed. See, my class is the best group of people you will ever meet! They are 34 of the most amazing people I know and I will deeply miss their influence in my life and their daily laughs, smiles, and words of encouragement. It was a bitter sweet day! I am so excited to be done with high school. Like a wise now college sophomore told me-“it’s so much better on the other side!” But I can’t express how much I will miss my class. These people have helped shaped me into the person I am. They have offered countless words of advice, opportunities to grow, and times to look back on with laughter and tears. And then there is my family-those 3 people in my life who I can always count on. They have given up so much of themselves and allowed me to do so much in high school-I honestly don’t know what I will do next year without them. and my church-I love my church. I love the people there, my pastors, and my youth leaders. They will be hard shoes to fill in whatever church I find down in Evansville. But before you think I am totally dreading college-I am so excited!!! I can’t wait to make new friends, gather new experiences, grow up a little, and learn the joys and woes of being a college freshman! Hopefully I will still be this excited come August! Overall, the past four years have been amazing and I am sure some of the best in my life. Graduation was a day I looked forward to and a day I will never forget–I mean who could forget a graduation that lasted 2 hours and 15 minutes. 🙂 I will continue to write as I enter a new chapter in my life. I am so excited and thankful to all those faithful who still read my blog! I love you all!
Just some thoughts..
Just to let you all know..
Faith Christian Varisty Eagles (guys and girls) are the 2005 IACS state champs! Oh ya..we rock! What a great way to end it all up! It was an exciting weekend and so fun to see our girls beat BA:) They needed to be beat.. And our guys played extremely well, even though they were missing two players to injury..(I love you Jon and Paul!) I so much enjoyed cheering on the teams..great season everyone!!
Now back to my senior thesis..:(
I hate those two words..I usually associate them with words like heart issue. But lately, God has shown me that I need an attitude adjustment. As I have posted on before, we are reading through the book A Purpose Driven Life. And this past week, one of the chapters was entitled “What Matters Most”. The answer was relationships. And I agree..which is where my need for an attitude change comes in. Right now, more then anything, I want to get away. I’m sick of dealing with people, I’m sick of immature humans who won’t let things die, I’m sick of paying attention in my classes, I’m sick of people who think it is their places to point out every one of my faults, and I’m sick of people who seem to always be complaining about the school. (although, I’m not claiming to be perfect in any of those areas, or to be above doing those things..I know I’m not) But God brought a verse to my mind the past week-I think it’s in Matthew. But it says, “I tell you, if you hate your brother in your heart, you are committing murder towards him.” Talk about a powerful verse. Now, I don’t have this long list of people I hate, but sadly, there are a small few on that list-sometimes they come and go, and sometimes they stay on there for long times. It’s wrong. That’s the simplest way to put it. My attitude is wrong. If relationships and people are most important, I shouldn’t be sick of them. and I shouldn’t hate anyone. So now comes the attitude adjustment. I need to view people as humans to be loved..not people there to serve me, or to make my life all fine and dandy. Yeah..they can be extremely frustrating..and sometimes they seem to have this innate ability to push you to your last nerve. But Christ died for them too. And He endured far worse suffering then I ever have or will. One of my teachers prayed today that those who needed an attitude adjustment would do that..and I am one of those people. As hard as it is going to be, and as long as it might take..I am going to work at changing my attitude. I am going to work at loving everyone in my life. Like Proverbs says, “A Soft answer turns away wrath.” I’m so quick to bite back or get defensive..but that is not what the bible commands us to do. God tells us to turn the other cheek. So..I’m starting day one of my attitude adjustment plan. I don’t know where it’s going to go-but I know it’s the right thing to do and I know it is pleasing to my God.
“Every moment of every minute of every day is to be filtered through the reality that God is ever-present.” -Pastor Doug
This morning in chapel Pastor Doug spoke to us about faith. Faith is one of those words you always hear about, but don’t often take the time to figure out what it really means. He said the quote above and it stuck with me. It got me thinking about how different my day would be if that were true of my life. If I lived my life according to that, what would be different about how I viewed my day. The first thing that popped into my mind was that I would probably never have a bad day. Since I usually complain about having a bad day due to circumstances in my life, living in view that God is ever-present would change that. I also thought that it would change my view on the conversations I have with my friends. Since God is ever-present He is sitting there, listening to every one of them. Would that be enough to change my topic, enough to get me to stop talking about that person who made me mad or the thing they said..I certaintly hope so! I think it would also change the way I act in class..since God is ever-present, He’s watching me. He sees me talk out and say things I shouldn’t. I realized that this is no not a part of my daily life, most of the time..I do my devotions and come to school, forgetting all that God has taught me. I get caught up in the petty things and long to hear the latest gossip. I don’t live based on a view that God is ever-present. But as Pastor Doug put it, Thursday is coming. The time when I will have to put into actions what I say I believe. I believe God is ever-present, it’s time I start living my life based on that. Based on that reality..even if it means giving up some things I think are so important. And I challenge you, are you living your life in view that God is ever-present? Do you think about the fact that He is with you throughout your entire day? I think it’s time we all started living like that.
Be Careful What You Wish For..
Last night as I was coming home from the basketball games, I was talking to one of my friends about the rest of my weekend. I had to work all day Saturday and was so not looking forward to it. I don’t like my job so much and standing on my feet for 4 1/2 hours did not sound like fun. My back hurt, my knee hurt, I had a headache and so on. So I made the remark..perhaps I could wake up tomorrow morning with a fever so I wouldn’t have to go into work..yay, that sounded like a good idea to me. Well, by the time I go home, my head was pounding and I was dying of heat. I crawled into bed, and slept until 8 this morning. When I woke up, lo and behold my temperature was 100 degrees. I felt miserable. So I called in sick to work..only to spend the rest of my day trying to get better so I could go out Saturday night. Needless to say, I’m still not that much better and am going to go hang out with a bunch of people all night..probably not the smartest move. So moral to my weekend..be careful what you wish for, you never know when it may actually come true!
Something that has been bothering me..
As of late, it seems my posts are being attacked with comments that are negative and to be frank, hurt. I am writing from my heart, and if you think I have erred in some way, I will be more then happy to admit and fix things. However, leaving nameless comments that do nothing more then tear me down do not help. I realize that their may be several people in my life I have hurt-whether knowingly or unknowingly. It saddens me that they use my blog to show their anger or hurt. I truly wish they would come talk to me. I am never going to grow or change unless someone is willing to tell me of my error. I promise I will try my best to respond in a Godly way..but I am also not perfect. I am still a human who sins and makes mistakes. It is frustrating because I do not know what I have done or what I have failed to do. I do not like to blog about this..but I also have been hurt by several comments placed. I realize they are just opinions and know not everyone is going to agree with me. Nor do I think that would be right. Constructive criticism is helpful. So I beg of you..I would love to know what you think and what you have to say. But I also want to make things right if I have wronged any of you. So consider this my plea, my apology, my request.
Last night our varsity guys basketball team had the awesome opportunity to play at conseco fieldhouse. And since I’m a cheerleader, I got to go and cheer. Let me tell you, it almost made cheerleading worth it. I can now say I’ve cheered on the same court the Pacers play on! And although our guys suffered a very disappointing loss, it was a blast! It was amazing how big it was, and how little and insignificant you feel out there-looking up at the stands and seeing no one. And how quiet you are..especially when there’s only 5 of you!:) We got the coolest dressing room in the whole world..it was full of couches and huge mirrors and tv’s..it was super cool!
But anyways..it was an awesome experience. One I will never forget!
Guys and Girlfriends..
If there is one thing in this world that doesn’t mix it’s guys and girlfriends. I have been on both ends of this..and I can tell you, no matter how many promises you make, they don’t mix. “I’d never choose a guy over you they say” and I have in fact said this myself. But once you start to like a guy and find the feeling is mutual, things are never the same. Oh, they may think it is..but the only thing they talk about is this guy. And instead of wanting to hang out with you on their open Friday nights, they want to hang out with that guy. And the worst part, is they think they are treating you the same. They still think things are peachy. And as much as I love hearing about my friend’s love lives, it gets old really quick. And please, don’t think I’m jealous..because I am not in the least. I could tell my own saga of guys to them, but I have chosen to focus on my savior.
I have given into the battle and I admit defeat. I know I am probably giving up to easily..but I’m not fighting for my friends’ attention. Too much is at stake. I’ll still be here if and when that guy breaks their heart..but sometimes actions are irreversible. I learned that lesson the hard way..and I still am working at rebuilding friendships I ruined all for a guy who could care less. but I know, they all think they have found the one. They think this is the key to their happiness. But let me tell you..it isn’t. And I wish you could see that. But like the defeated foe goes home from battle, shoulders drooping, eyes full of pain and anger-I too am walking away.
It’s official..School is out for Christmas Break!! I am so excited..this break was very much needed! I hope you all have a wonderful break and enjoy some much needed R and R..Let’s not let this break become all about us though! anyways..I’ll blog more later, just wanted to say Merry Christmas!!
Odds and Ends
Today was the first day of finals, and my birthday! All my hard ones are over..yay!! Not much else..
Last night was the survivor finale..Sandra won. Not the person whom I wanted, but still she deserved it more than the other person. Jon was finally voted off…I can’t believe how far he made it. Just shows the sinfulness of our culture..and the acceptance of wrong as right. I wish D had won..she was my favorite person on the show! But hey, she got super far and will probably still get some modeling jobs out of the deal! I am a die hard survivor fan!! So now, my Thursdays are going to be lonely..but there is another season coming sometime!! Who will the new contestants be? What will they be like? Ah..the questions! But I will leave you all..since I’m probably the only person who actually cares:)