The other day I was at the grocery store. I had gotten there later than I planned so it was pushing 5:00 when my husband called. Having left him home with our child, I was a bit concerned. He assured me everything was fine and then proceeded to let me know our neighbors had decided they could come for dinner. We quickly created a menu and I picked up the few things I needed in order to hurry home and prepare a meal.
A little over an hour later, our neighbors showed up and entertained the little man while we finished up dinner. They were so appreciative of the meal and we enjoyed chatting with them. He started chemo the next day and we had been talking about having them over for awhile so I was thankful it actually happened.
However, I will assure you, my house was in zero shape to have company. There was a pile of dirty dishes taking over a good chunk of the counter, I quickly vacuumed right before they arrived, I am sure the house was dusty, and H had basically destroyed the living room. Not to mention my work stuff and a few boxes of items that have yet to find a home. As our neighbors walked in I simply said please excuse the mess. She didn’t notice and instead commented on how much she liked what we had done with the house.
In my mind I was laughing. My once neat and tidy house is now an often constant state of chaos. Cleaning and organizing have fallen so far off the radar, I wonder sometimes if it is even worth trying. I do clean and pick it up fairly often so don’t think we are living in total disgust. And thanks to a dear friend, I found some cleaning products which are amazing and reduce the time it takes to clean the house. However, this day, it had been a tad longer than normal because we have had a busy few weeks.
After they left, I realized how often we miss out on moments to live in community and be neighbors and friends because of our houses. Our houses full of stuff we probably don’t need. I remember how many times as I have traveled, people with far less have invited me in and made me feel welcome. Sometimes it was sitting on a dirt floor or a broken chair, but they never apologized. They just said come in. This is the kind of hospitality I want to have going forward. Yes, my house will probably be a mess. This is what happens when you live in it and have an almost one-year old and work full time. But the state of my house does not negate the fact we all crave community. We all want human interaction. And a messy kitchen more than likely assures the food will be good!
So this is my resolution. Excuse the mess and come on over. I am not going to stress myself out cleaning up for company, but rather relish in the last minute dinners and times spent with friends. And if you do the same, we will start to realize we can take off our clean house facades and let each other into the mess of our lives. If we are willing to invite others in to our messy houses, we will be willing to let them into our messy lives. And that my friends is when true community begins to happen and when life transformation and sweet friendships are formed that go beyond mommy wars or keeping up with the Jones’s attitudes.
