I went running today. But not because I wanted to. Honestly, I don’t know anyone who wants to go running when the humidity is at 90% and the heat index is equally as high. I went because I needed to run.
Yes I just used the word need and run in the same sentence, an idea probably foreign to most of you.
But earlier I had organized and cleaned my classroom for the umpteenth time, wrote out minute-by-minute lesson plans for next week, made all the copies needed for four ESL classes, and wrote guidelines for three classes of computer projects. (I am going to be gone next week so don’t think I normally do all that) Then I left school drained, exhausted, and emotionally spent.
Thus, I ran. Because running is something I love. Normally. And this week seems to be full of things I do not love. Job loss, uncertainity, teaching, being away from family. And all of that has caused me to question my current path..
..giving up a good paying job on a tropical island, leaving one of my best friends behind, moving back in with the parents, joining once again the ranks of the unemployed, and with no clue how to get where I want to go mostly because I am not sure where I want to go.
Running clarifies everything. So I ran. With every step a vision clearer and more focused came into view. The one that above all else flies the banner that says, “Pursue your dreams and live life loud.” I am a very passionate person. Its why I cry at a moments notice, get angry over the smallest things, and get excited very easily. I knew before this week that teaching was just not the fulfillment of all my passions that I had hoped it would be. I got slightly distracted by the lure of a well-paying job, but after a run was once again focused on the end goal: pursue that which makes me come alive, love like Jesus loves, and serve those around me. And then I told myself, “Focus, focus, focus!” Stop getting so distracted!
Right now that exact path is a bit unclear. The specfics aren’t there quite yet. In the meantime, I am treading miles for victims of an awful industry. And writing. And connecting with like-minded people. And gaining some awesome experiences. And waiting and praying. That way when the specifics fall into place, I am ready and prepared.
What about you? What do you do before a vision has yet to come to reality? How do you stay focused on the end goal when the immediate can be so enticing?
