so I have to leave for work in an hour..for ten long hours of work. And honestly, I usually don’t mind working, in fact, most of the time I would rather work then do anything else. But today I just want to crawl in bed and do nothing. I don’t want to think or talk to anyone or do anything other then sleep and hope life is different when I wake up. Granted, sleeping will do nothing to change my life currently, but it might make me feel better. I am frustrated and confused. And I have to move on from the past..but it keeps haunting me with what ifs and why nots. sometimes I wish I just had the guts to let it all out. To put exactly how I feel on the table and see what happens. I am almost sure nothing would change, but I wonder if that would give me the closure I need to move on. Or would it just make me wish I had kept my mouth shut.. I can’t though. If I am ever going to give someone else a chance, I have to get rid of these feelings and heartache. I have to accept the fact that in God’s eyes I am perfect and beautiful and no human can ever change that. No matter what they say. I have to trust in God’s perfect plan for my life, regardless of how unknown and scary it is. And beyond anything I have to stop talking about it and actually DO it. I am have to stop talking about moving on and actually move on. Oh if only it was as easily said as done. That’s it. I am done. I will be back later.