Faith

I am Comfortable…..not

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That is one word that hasn’t been in my vocabulary since August. It seems I am never comfortable–it’s too cold, too hot, too rainy, too sunny–and those are just the superficial things. In all reality, I am not comfortable in my surroundings which is a very good thing. For a long time, I was comfortable–I went to school with my friends, went to church with my friends, hung out on the weekends with my friends and my life went on smoothly. Then August 29th I picked up and started school four hours from home knowing almost no one with no idea what to expect and how things were going to be. Needless to say, I am still not adjusted, and still not comfortable–and Lord-willing, I never will be. I hope I am always looking for ways to be stretched and grow. I have had to learn to love the unlovely, to take the log out of my eye before examining the speck in my brother’s, to share a room and a life, to manage my time(which I am still working on..obviously:) ) and most importantly to live a life that speaks louder then my words and exlemplfy Christ daily. I am constantly having to step back and evaluate whether this will put Christ in the best light or not. And it’s not always easy–it’s rather lonely hanging out in your dorm room on Friday night with one other person while every other person on your floor is out partying. And it’s hard to say no to that really hot guy who wants you to come over. But God is the ultimate granter of strength and has provided me amazing opportunity. Little windows and doors are opened daily and people do ask questions. Is is easy? no.. Do I miss home and my friends? yes.. but do I regret getting away and putting myself in this situation? NO! I know God has me here for a reason and I am daily getting to see that manifested in my life and the life of those around me. And God is using this to mold me into who He wants me to be. He is letting me make mistakes and get back up. Say the wrong words, and then have the opportunity to say the right ones. Learn things I never wanted to know and praise God for giving me strength to say no. So, while I am not comfortable, I am exactly where I want to be. And even though I do miss home.. for now, I don’t want to be anywhere else..

aspiring writer, mom to two sweet boys, lover of adventure, people, Jesus, and hot tea

2 Comments

  • kiwi

    i totallly understand what you're saying! It is so weird to be among those who are always talking about drinking and smoking. But God has given me strength and peace when i ask Him. He's sooo faithful! I'm content, knowing that i'm following His will

  • Beth

    That's such an amazing way to think about it…"I never want to be comfortable." That was such an inspiration, Amanda, and came just at the right time. I love you, girl, and I'm praying for you! May we NEVER become comfortable in this world–wow. 🙂

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